Well, here it is a month since I last blogged and once again I feel as if i've neglected it. Inasmuch as i know it's there and I am grateful for the therapeutic value it represents, I hoped and prayed I would never have to use it for that purpose. So often you see blogs that are nothing more than laments upon one's love life and thus I didn't want it to come to that with me.
A foolish proposition, I know, but one can hope.
Anyway, tonight I spent the better part of three hours successfully saving a committed relationship from going under. It is the first time I have ever succeeded in doing so and though I feel a great relief at actually accomplishing it, a great challenge has been put before me. As it turns out as confident as I was in how solid a relationship I was in with her, apparently I was falling short in am few key areas.
Right or wrong it's something thatultimately needs to be done not only for the betterment of my relationship with her, but for myself as well. For example, I was thinking just the other day of how nice it was to come home to my own place, cook food that i had bought with my money, and fall asleep in my place. This is not to say I am ungrateful for the assist my mother has given me since moving back in, especially in light of my recent medical turn...it's just that I am 41 years old and I'm still at home. This of course is only the tip of the iceberg.
I need to be a better man in general for her. I look back at what a solid guy my Dad was, both in how he did his financial situation but in his charecter. You always knew where you stood with my old man when the rubber met the road. He had a great partner in my mother and I guess I lost track of how their partnership worked over the years because no matter what my sister and I never wanted for anything...we had what we needed. I only recall my old man being foolish with money once while I was growing up, but he just moved forward from it. If he worried about it he never showed it.
In short I gotta get my life in order. I have to buckle down and get my adult life started back up again. Luckily for me she was good enough to spell things out for me. You don't always get that when things like this go down...you have to figure them out for yourself, by and large. Some might consider that a cheat but in all reality if I was left alone to figure it out it would take a longer amount of time than she would be willing to grant me.
The fact is, dear readers, I have been singing a sweet Melody for 7 months now and the last thing I want in the world is for to be unhappy with me. She is, unfortunately, and I have been charged with making it right. I will, and I will be a better man because of it.
I love her so much, my friends...I can't stand the thought of losing her.
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